me ask archive mine

xzdp:

fackinggcody:

  • send her good morning texts
  • grab the booty next
  • feed her pizza before sex

Words to live by.

lmaoo

going-to-scranton:

Michael, do you remember, you specifically told me to only bring one sheet of paper? You said it only takes one sheet to make a difference. And I said, “Are you sure Michael?” And you said “Pam! Pam! Pam!” And then you sneezed in my tea, and then you said, “Don’t worry, it’s just allergies.” Do you remember that?

ULTRAVIOLENCNE IS THE FCKUCKING BESXT OMg